Understanding Terminal Restlessness in the Dying
Before funerals at funeral homes in Camillus, NY, our loved ones who are dying undergo a lot of changes during the last few weeks, days, and hours of their lives. These are typical in the dying process – although not all people experience all the normal changes as the body begins to shut down – and if we understand them, then we can know what to do to help our loved ones be as comfortable as possible.
One change that many people who are dying experience is terminal restlessness. While this may not be particularly distressing for them (in some cases, it is), it can be not only distressing for us, but it can also be exhausting, because this can be a non-stop flurry of activity or talking that can rob us of sleep and energy.
What is terminal restlessness? It is also known as terminal agitation or terminal delirium. It is manifested by physical restlessness (constantly moving, constantly talking, constantly trying to do one thing or several things are common), spiritual restlessness (may seem to be fixated on God and on the afterlife), emotional restlessness (may be rotating between very happy, very sad, and very angry), mental restlessness (may be wanting to contact or waiting for or even greeting and talking to important people in their lives who’ve either died or live far away).
Additionally, terminal restlessness may include anxiety, agitation, and cognitive decline, along with outbursts (profanity, even from people who don’t normally use profanity), attention deficit, aimlessness, and rejection of everything.
All of this activity can be very hard for us as caregivers to know how to respond. Often, it doesn’t seem to matter what we say or do, because there’s no change in how our dying loved ones behave.
Some of these, which can be characterized by either calm, but lethargic and unresponsive behavior or hyperactive, aggressive, and hostile behavior, are not aimed at others, but are instead a response to the physiological changes, some of which can be physically uncomfortable, of dying.
Other ways that terminal restlessness may present include indecisiveness (even from people who, before they were dying, were very decisive), looking or asking for things and then turning away from them, and suddenly hurling accusations of wrongdoing at people without any provocation.
Terminal restlessness and nearing death awareness are not the same thing, but they may occur at the same time. Some of the causes of terminal restlessness may be reversed, if they are being caused by medical treatment at the end of life.
When a person is dying, medications for comfort and anxiety-reduction are often prescribed. While these have their place in the dying process – especially in the final days and hours of life – they can also produce some of the symptoms of terminal restlessness.
Additional causes of terminal restlessness may include medications used in chemotherapy, steroids, poorly managed (under-medicated or over-medicated) pain, and organ failure.
Terminal restlessness generally occurs within weeks or days of death. It may go away by itself, but our medical teams can help manage the symptoms. Meanwhile, as caregivers we should not take the effects of terminal restlessness personally.
No matter how our loved ones who are dying are acting toward us, it is not a reflection of who they are or how they really feel about us. It’s important to stay calm and not react in like manner, especially if our dying loved ones are angry, hostile, and accusatory, as hard as that may be in the moment.
Our loved ones don’t know what they’re doing, but we do, and responding in kind to undesirable behavior can leave us with a lot of regrets and guilt after our loved one has died.
For more information about funerals at funeral homes in Camillus, NY, our compassionate and experienced team at Bagozzi Twins Funeral Home, Inc. is here to help you. You can visit our funeral home at 2601 Milton Ave., Solvay, NY 13209, or you can call us today at (315) 468-2431.
